A Love Letter to My Network

I’m filled with gratitude, because my network is generous, open, responsive – and cool AF.

I’m a connector to my core so I get an adrenaline hit when I curate pairs of humans I know will appreciate each other and learn from even a simple half hour conversation.

And my network shows up!

Whether it’s former clients talking to new clients about how the process worked for them.

Or former colleagues at my clients’ target companies – talking about culture, leadership and the day to day of a role.

The number of connections I’m able to make a week is one of my favorite parts of the job.

So thank you for your time.

Thank you for paying it forward if you’ve been helped in your career transition.

Thank you for normalizing that it’s ok and even exciting to want something new.

I appreciate you and all that you are offering to my clients who have no idea how they will find the right connection to what’s next in their career.

I often find that right connection with you and in you.

And if you’re still looking to meet some new people in the Brooklyn area this month – I’m having what will most likely be my last Career Walk and Talk of 2024 and this time we’re doing a lunch edition.

We’ll be meeting…

Wednesday, November 20th at 12pm ET at Prospect Park, 3rd street entrance
(We’re keeping it to 60 minutes this time.)

Vote + Take Action + Take Care

Many of us have been waiting for, talking about, losing our freaking minds over this day for more than a year now. 

And, it’s here. 

I know you’re not thinking about your career today. It’s ok. 

It will be there for you tomorrow. Today is not the day for you to be brainstorming about your next move or the upcoming networking conversations you’re going to have. 

Instead, here’s what you can do:

Vote

If you’ve already voted early, go you! If you haven’t voted yet, make a plan, bring your kids with you, wait in line with a buddy. Just. Vote! Here’s the link to find your polling place if you’re unclear: https://vote.nyc/page/find-your-poll-site

Take Action

I find I’m more optimistic and less stressed when I’m taking action, rather than listening to the thousandth podcast episode about today’s poll. This election may come down to HUNDREDS of votes in swing states. Phone bank or knock doors. Reach out to 3 people you know in swing states to see if they voted. Offer to help elderly neighbors to get to the polls. Doing something will help you make it through this day.

Take Care

Find your people. Hold them tight. Be in community, if you can. Breathe. Focus on what you can control. Listen to a free election-related meditation from Headspace, go for a walk or run, do some yoga or perhaps now might be the moment to try out kickboxing. Moving your body will help you release stress and find moments of joy in a tough day. 

But most of all – show yourself compassion and grace for what happens and doesn’t happen today. You are human. This is hard. There’s so much at stake right now – and I’m right there with you. 

How to see the Interview Red Flags 🚩

I often talk to folks in my network who are six months (or less) into their roles and are already planning their exits. 

They mention the asshole boss or the toxic culture – or both. Typically they’re a match made in corporate hell. 

It always makes me curious. Were the red flags visible in the interview process? Or did this assholery come as a shocking surprise? 

When I pose the question with all of my coachy compassion, I usually get a, “Well, now that I think about it, they were. But I didn’t put it all together.”

So here are a few ideas to help you – put it all together – and actively recognize the red flags:

1. Tone and language:
Interviews are a time for the organization to be on their best behavior and sell you on the company and the role – while they’re getting to know you. If your interviewer is rude or worst case mean in an interview – we tend to write it off or double down on trying to win them over. Don’t do either. They are showing you who they are. If this is supposed to be their best, imagine the prickliness of their worst. 

2. Listening skills:

Do your interviewers seem to be truly taking in what you’re saying or are they monologuing and interrupting you? Do they respect you when you try to jump in with your questions? Do they leave any time for your questions? This is especially important when it comes to the hiring manager. Is this how you want your one on one meetings to go? Do you expect they will ever try to understand you and what kind of support you need? 

3. The feeling in your body:

As I say often, our bodies hold a lot of wisdom we tend to ignore. If you have a racing heart, chest constriction, stomach pangs or if you generally feel like you need to immediately outrun a cheetah – pay attention! Sure, in any interview you will feel nerves, butterflies and adrenaline. This is different. What I hear from people who retroactively realize the signs were there, is that their bodies were projecting the red flags on their interviewers foreheads, but they chose to explain it away. 

I know this all takes practice – and it may seem there are way too many things to focus on in an interview already. How do I add this to the list?  This isn’t meant to overwhelm you. It’s more about trusting your intuition and building awareness that you deserve better than these red flag behaviors. These are people you’re going to be spending more time with than many members of your own family. If possible – it would be great to be able to communicate with them or dare I say – even like them. 

I’d love to hear from you about some of the red flags you’ve noticed in your interview processes. If we know what we’re looking for, we can work together to say no thank you. 

3 Fall Networking Tips

If you’re wondering if there’s a perfect season for networking, the answer is yes and you’re currently in it.

So consider this the kick, the fire, the pumpkin to motivate you to get it rolling.

The six-ish weeks of October into mid-November falls after the busy-ness of summer and back to school and before the drama/trauma of the holiday season. Plus, the weather is close to ideal in many parts of the country right now – so meeting outdoors for a coffee – or one of my Career Walk and Talks feels like a treat.

For those of you who writhe at the thought of networking, I see you. I have all of you in mind as I’m writing.

And for the rest of you who actually enjoy it, but don’t know how to get it started, I’m happy to offer up some ideas beyond – set up a zoom with a former colleague. I know you’ve already had that zoom and you’re way zoomed out to do it for fun. I’m with you!

Here are 3 ways to get your networking in during this season:

Explore Eventbrite:

You may have noticed I’ve been adding my events lately to Eventbrite and I’m loving how it’s going! I’m meeting interesting, cool people who I wouldn’t have been able to reach otherwise. For my first Career Walk and Talk, we had a health tech professional considering moving to Brooklyn so she came for a walk and loaded her days with Eventbrite events to network and meet people. With some strategic search terms, you can find many events per week that would meet your needs. I’m impressed with how it’s grown and how useful it can be.

Volunteer:

We have a pretty important election coming up and many of my clients are currently in job searches are also: volunteering for local and national campaigns, attending and hosting postcarding parties, going out with groups to canvas for candidates – and in all of these efforts you’re both – doing something that’s important to you AND meeting people who may have similar interests and values. Of course your volunteering doesn’t need to be political – your helping of organizations allows you to give back to meaningful causes while at the same time – meeting people you wouldn’t have come across in your day to day or on LinkedIn. Remember to have a casual version of your pitch ready to go. You never know who you’ll be volunteering with!

Gather people plus ones:

If you’re a gathering type (you know who you are and we appreciate you!), ask a group of friends or colleagues to join you for a potluck, at a bar – wherever – and ask each of them to bring an interesting plus one friend (not date). This way, you get to expand your group beyond your typical crew and you know these people have been vetted by your people. Oftentimes the first step in networking is to expand beyond your go-to folks. As strange as it sounds, your inner circle people are not always the most helpful in your career and job search. It’s typically your looser connections that add most of the value – whether it’s because they are naturally connector types or they want to pay it forward after having been helped in a search.

I’m curious to hear how your fall connecting goes. If you have additional winner ideas – send them my way so I can share more broadly.