Four years into my last Digital Marketing role, I started to get a little antsy. My younger daughter was over a year old. I had steady childcare coverage and was in a healthy place with self-care (respect to my second born who came out of the womb a good sleeper. I heard this was possible, but never believed!). I was out of working mom triage mode (congrats to the former me!) and began to yearn for a more fulfilling and exciting career. Every time I thought of leaving, I came to the very sound conclusion, “You would be freaking out of your mind to leave this unicorn of a Mommy Dream Job.” I had flexible hours, co-workers I adored, respect, appreciation and a steady salary. So, there was all of that. 

When I looked at job descriptions for roles that would be a natural next step with Director of Digital Marketing titles, all I could see were gaps in my experience and reasons they might not hire me--not to mention the dreaded words “fast-paced environment” or “Must be good under pressure.” 

And then it came to me. Why don’t I make the job I have into the job I want? I’ve outlined some of the steps I took so you can try them out if you’re in a similar situation and ready to start evolving your role into the one you want.

1. Write an aspirational job description WITH a new title
Now is the time to get creative! How would you tweak your current role to become more exciting, fulfilling and more like the role that’s potentially next on your trajectory? Depending on your relationship with your leader and the culture in your organization, you may or may not share this with the team. Even if you never share it with anyone, it’s great for you to have so you know what you’re shooting for and so you can explain the more tactical tweaks to leadership. This may be controversial in some companies, but in smaller firms—tweaks to titles are absolutely possible. Choose a title that reflects the gravity of your new role and something that will be a closer connection to the next step in your career. 

2. Identify skills you want to learn
In my case, I wanted to better understand Digital Content Strategy so I could set the strategic vision for all of our digital and social channels—based on past performance data and strategic goals of the organization. I selected an online course that was well reviewed and requested that my organization fund it because I would be rolling out my new skills to the benefit of the company. Once the course and the strategy were completed, we rolled it out across our channels and tripled our social engagement. It was a win-win-win! What are the skills you want to learn that would also make an impact for the organization and your customers?

3. Earmark conferences you want to attend
Remember all of the times you turned down those invites to interesting sounding events and conferences because you felt like you didn’t have anything exciting to talk about? Instead, you hid out at your desk, optimizing your budget spreadsheet for the umpteenth time that week. Well, things have changed, friend! You’ve wrangled yourself a new role with new projects and opportunities to learn new skills. Now would be a great time to get out onto the conference circuit to be exposed to new ways of thinking and success stories from other companies. Start small with some free or low-cost events that may be two to three hours. Give your leaders the chance to see the impact this time is making on your engagement in your role and on your results before you ask for a ticket to SXSW. 

4. Delegate areas of your role you don’t enjoy (wherever possible)
This one has a few caveats for those who don’t have any direct reports, but in my case I had a few smart, capable employees on my team to whom I could hand over work that they enjoyed and I did not. I made a clearer separation between our roles and eventually was able to distribute that to the broader team. My guess is that there are some of you out there who have employees, freelancers, vendors or agencies to which you can delegate certain tasks, but you don’t because you’re either good at these things or you’re known for these things. Neither of these are good reasons to hold on. Delegating tasks is a great way to leave space for new skills and growth. It can be scary to give up the thing we know is a slam dunk in exchange for the thing we’re just learning—but it’s the only way to stretch our skill-sets and embody everything in our aspirational job descriptions!

5. Sell in your ideas to leadership
It’s one thing to put this all on paper, but within 99% of organizations you’ll need to sell this move to leadership to help them understand why it’s good for the company. Help explain why your new direction is in synch with the goals of the team and the broader organization. Promise to keep leadership in lockstep with your evolving vision and your learnings so that your new knowledge benefits a wider audience. In my case and in the case of many of my clients, the leaders involved were not only anxious to make the changes to roles to benefit the organization, but they respected the initiative and courage that came from the employee to bring it to their attention. This will not always be the case. If that is your situation, then you know where you stand and you have some deep thinking to do about your next step. 

By re-inventing my job, I was able to take on more of a leadership role at the organization because I was confident and proud about what I was doing day to day and the impact I was making for the business. Two years into that role, I discovered coaching, fell in love and the rest is history—but I credit this time in my tenure at the organization to helping me get my career mojo back after having my kids. It was one of those moments I was reminded—hey I’m the one in charge of my career! And man, did that mantra stick! 

If you’ve decided 2017 is your year to jump back into the workforce, but you have no idea where to start, take a breath and know, 1) you’re not alone and 2) career badassery is like muscle memory—it’s in you, you simply need to wake it up. 

Many of my clients have taken time off to care for their children full time or for a sick or elderly parent. This world of potty training, tantrums, special needs testing or lining up round the clock care for mom--feels a galaxy away from the powerful meetings they used to lead with goals and agendas, collaborating with cross-functional teams to launch projects on time and on budget. It can feel that way, but know—these worlds are closer than they appear to be with the naked eye. 

Outside of a resume and a few new skills, what I find are the two most critical things my clients need to re-enter the workforce are CONFIDENCE—the belief that you can get back into a career you enjoy and that you belong there, and CAREER MOJO—that feeling you have when ideas are flowing and there’s momentum on your career path. 

Here are the three things you should do to regain your confidence and career mojo right now! 

1. Take On a Project:
Getting into action around a topic you want to explore is the best way to boost both your confidence and your career mojo all at once! You could help a friend with her business by managing her social media and email marketing. Or you could run an event for your child’s school. As you step into your project, be intentional about the skills you want to learn, take copious notes on systems you’re setting up and ways you can improve your process. Take free and inexpensive online courses while working on your project so that you can put your new skills to the test in a specific and measurable way. Spend time writing ideas for tactics to take your skills to the next level within your project and beyond. Ask your project sponsor for a LinkedIn Recommendation so that you can demonstrate your hard work and innovative thinking during this time where you have a gap in your experience. 

2. Build A Personal Brand And A Social Presence
When you’re job searching, one of the first things hiring managers will do is to take a look at your social presence. Does your LinkedIn match your resume? Are you active on LinkedIn? Do you like, post others’ content or write your own articles? If you’re going to be applying for Digital or Social Marketing positions, add Twitter and potentially Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat and Pinterest to the list. My advice here though, is to start with ONE you know and ONE on which you can post regularly before you set yourself up for Social World Domination. Usually when I talk to clients about a social presence, I hear a lot of, “What should I write?” I could (and should) write an entire post about this, but at a high level, you should start with 5-10 themes that make up the person you are. This works best when the themes range from the serious and professional to the mundane and quirky. For example, if you’re looking to join a Wellness Brand a potential list could be: Wellness Startup Profiles, Mind/Body Connection, Work-life balance, Favorite Books and Podcasts, Dogs. Now while you’re not going to write posts every week about dogs, a sprinkling of dog humor and ways that dogs help with wellness can be a way to better define the unique formula for who you are and how you stand out. 

3. Connect With Your Supporters
Remember those people throughout your pre-kids career who advocated for you, mentored you, believed in you and pushed you farther than you pushed yourself? It’s time to put them on a list and start reaching out to them one by one. They won’t all have time to meet with you. Don’t take that personally! That’s why you’re making a list. Move on to the next person and begin setting up phone calls, coffees and lunches. Make it easy for them to help you by being flexible and working around their schedules and their desired venues. In your meetings, be sure to talk about your project, what you’re learning and where you want to go with your next step in your career. Set an intention to ask for one thing in each meeting. These people want to see you succeed. Don’t forget to ask for help in some way! They could connect you with contacts at companies you want to network into, or write a recommendation for you on LinkedIn or just be available for a support email from time to time. 

You may be wondering how your resume didn’t make it to my top 3. Many of my clients think that their out of date resume is what’s holding up their re-boot, but I find that once these other pieces are in play, the resume, the direction and the list of companies to contact falls into place. Now go out and re-claim your confidence and career mojo so you can make 2017 your year! 

Twelve years ago, I was part of a layoff at a company that was going through a dramatic downsizing process. I was given three months' severance that kicked in during the sunny first days of June. Instead of sulking and hiding out, I broke out my sundresses, bought myself a pair of pink Pumas and deemed it, "The Summer of Rachel." I took the time to explore my options AND do the reflecting I needed to do to land the right next gig. What did I like about my job? What do I want to do more of? Less of? While I didn't wear my Pumas to networking meetings, I DID talk all about the "Summer of Rachel." Everyone got it. The gift of time to do things I enjoy, spend time with people I love, the space to "not know" for a while.

When you're in the process of figuring out what's next in your career, a time of "not knowing" can be terrifying. My high-achieving, goal-oriented clients admit, "On top of hating that I don't know the answers, how in the world do I explain where I am right now to my family, my former colleagues, my mentors? I feel like a flake!" Of course you feel that way, because that's how you're choosing to feel. I don't know if it's because I'm an optimist or a former marketer, but my next question is always, "How would you describe this time if you had to make it sound exciting…or like a gift?"

The truth is that it takes courage to explore something new. The process can be exhilarating, but it can also be scary and leave you with (as the sage Brené Brown would say) a vulnerability hangover! Hangovers aside, this is the time when being honest and authentic in your relationships can bring your connections to a deeper level. You can admit you don't know the answers. This doesn't make you a slacker. In fact, it makes you a hero. I can assure you the people sitting across from you don't have all the answers either. They have been in your seat in the past or may be inspired by your courage because they are desperate to make a change. 

How do you want to own your career transition story? Let's start with writing a Career Transition Elevator Pitch with some examples from my own career transition from Marketing to Career and Leadership Coaching:

1. Own up to being in a career transition. How does this sound for you?: Example: After 16 years in Marketing, I decided to take a step back to figure out my next move. I looked at my strengths, what I've loved about past jobs and started putting the puzzle pieces together. I don't have the answers yet, but I'm enjoying the process of figuring them out. 

2. What are you finding exciting about this time?: Example: It's exciting to start considering the skills outside of past job titles and descriptions for which people have always sought me out. Motivation, mentoring, writing, career advice. I've done these things throughout my career and when I did them—that's when I felt completely myself. There's something there that I need to look into for sure! 

3. How can this person help you?: Example - Now I'm talking to people who have similar strengths and roles that they seem to enjoy. Would you mind telling me more about your role, how you got there and what you like about it? 

4. Now put it all together!: String all the pieces of your pitch together. You get bonus points if you come up with a fun and creative title for your exploration time. This can be a gem that emphasizes your personal brand AND a clue that you don't take yourself too seriously. 

5. Practice: Practice with friends, family and your close-in circle. Make sure it sounds like your voice and your personality -- not robotic. 

Now own it with the chutzpah it deserves! This is where you are right now. It's not where you'll be forever. Fight it, and you will continue to struggle. Accept it, and you will move through it with grace and a deeper understanding of who you are. 

If you’re looking for a little extra support in honing your Elevator Pitch, please consider the Nail Your Elevator Pitch Mini Course!

The Mini Course includes…

Five short videos that walk you through:

• A welcome and setting you up for success

• Identifying your strengths

• The strategy and approach to writing your pitch

• The formula for three different types of pitches based on your situation

• Getting into action with your pitch

Plus, a workbook where you can write the first drafts of your pitch.

All for $60!

Add a 45-minute 1:1 session to workshop your pitch with Rachel for $125.

Let’s get you out there networking with a pitch that will give you the momentum you need to make that next big career move. Take the next step here: https://www.rachelbgarrett.com/pitch

Often when my clients come to see me, they know they want a career change. They know they’re craving something new, but they feel stuck. They’re exhausted and depleted. They’ve sandwiched our session between a presentation to senior leadership and the errands that are mission critical to running their home for the week (ie. picking up the kid who will be the last one standing at daycare, again). 

When I ask them, “What would you be doing right now if money and time were no object?”, I get a deer in headlights look in response. Not only do they have no answer, but they’re also furious at themselves for being this far along in their careers without knowing what they want to be when they grow up! 

Overwhelm coupled with an anvil of pressure to “do it all” is standing in the way of creative ideas about your next career move. When you keep pushing through the slog, you feel like a shell of your pre-kids self. Remember those (still Type A but) healthy dreamer people? They’re in there, I promise! They had hobbies and unscheduled time where they could disappear for a few weekend hours, be completely unproductive and it didn’t matter. In fact, after they had that time, they showed up to work the next day energized, alive and dare I say, brilliant. 

Let’s reconnect with that carefree-ish person and unpack your overwhelm with the Roles and Responsibilities Experiment I use with working parents:

Roles and Responsibilities Experiment: 
1) Its brain dump time, friend. Break out a piece of paper and create three columns: Work, Parenting and Household. 

2) For each category, write a list of the tasks you’re responsible for on a daily or weekly basis. For now, we’re going to focus on the Parenting and Household categories because my guess is that you do this type of exercise at work regularly. Don’t hold back…put it all on there. Gifts for friends and family take time to purchase. Lunches take time to make. Managing childcare, paying bills, budgeting, scheduling play dates—it’s all fair game and it adds up. This part of our lives is what I call—“The Third Job” and it often puts my working parent clients over the edge. 

3) Now that you have your list, put:

• a “heart” next to all of the tasks you love doing
• a “star” next to the tasks you think are a high priority in your life
• a “D” next to all of the tasks that could be candidates to delegate to your partner, your kids or someone you can hire if you have the means.
• an “S” next to all of the tasks you feel you “should” do, but you’re not truly connected to them. (This group has it’s own exercise that’s coming soon so hang on to it!)

4) Review your list and note what comes up for you. Are there any D’s and S’s on your list? IF NOT, REPEAT STEP 3! Don’t think I don’t know this trick! You’re holding onto control and that’s a surefire way to stay exactly where you are. If you want to move forward, you need to create space and that means letting go of some things. 

5) For those with partners, ask them to do the exercise as well. You can use this as a starting point for a conversation about shifting some roles and responsibilities. Last summer, I took on all of our personal finance tasks including budgeting, bill paying, investing and projecting annual expenses while my husband took on grocery shopping, meal planning and much of the cooking. It’s not perfect (and it will never be), but our kids are trying new foods and we’re more on top of our finances than ever before. It’s an exciting shift. 

6) If you do decide to shift roles, remember there’s a learning curve! You’ve been making lunches and managing the babysitter for years—give your partner some room to make mistakes and learn without judgment. Resist your instinct to take back control after one or two mistakes. When you say things like, “I’m the only one who can put the baby to bed.” you tighten your handcuffs and remove any chance of having a weekend away in your near future! 

As you begin to create space by removing your “should” tasks and delegating, start to fill that space with things that bring you joy. It’s in this time when you’re doing the things you love in the space that you’ve carefully guarded for only you, that you will begin to find clues about your next exciting career move. 

You officially put 2016 (a whopper of a year) to bed with the raucous bang it deserved.  Your goals are set. Your plan is mapped. Your desk is organized and neat and hungry for the powerful action 2017 will inevitably bring.  

There’s one monumental thing you forgot—and in my experience it’s this thing that is the magic that successfully moves people from Point A to Point B, or more realistically—Point A to Point A.1 to Point A.2 and so on. This magic is your team! 

Your team should include all of the people who already support you, cheer you on and motivate you right now--in an informal way. Now we’re going to make it official and specific. You won’t need to draw up contracts or roles and responsibilities documents, and there won’t be money changing hands, just some coffee, wine or a meal on occasion. You will ask for their help by acknowledging their meaning and the special role they play in your life. Yes, deep, but we don’t build powerful, lasting relationships without going there. And in 2017, we’re going there! 

Modern wisdom (or perhaps it’s age-old wisdom that’s new again) tells us that when we seek a life partner, we can’t expect that person to fulfill our every need. I like to apply this filter to my team. To live a powerful life that I create, to be a leader—I’m going to need a lot of support to get there. The open job recs are vast, so let’s identify the needs before we fill the roles. 

2017 Career Support Team

1. Person to make you laugh when shit hits the fan
2. Subject Matter Expert in your field 
3. Someone in your industry, at your level AND who actually cares about your day to day minutia
4. Guru who has navigated his/her career with impressive wisdom
5. Unconditional loving person who will just let you talk
6. Unconditional loving person who cuts off your talking to push you to go deeper 
7. Running partner
8. The one who sits with you when you cry
9. Childhood friend who can cheer you on by telling you that you’ve always had this in you OR that you’ve come such a long way
10. The one who will drop everything and play hooky with you to see a movie 

Your list will look different than mine, of course. 

And before you fill the roles, let’s be clear who SHOULD NOT be on the list. I see clients mistakenly looking to these people for support and as a result, they end up feeling frustrated and depleted. 

2017 People Who Love Us But Don’t Overtly Support Us

1. The person who feels threatened by you (for reasons that are not about you)
2. Negative friend or family member who constantly challenges your actions
3. The person who wants you to play it safe because he/she is scared for you or for both of you

What I find comforting about this short list of people—is that just because they may not support you in taking on some of your goals, it doesn’t mean you need to discontinue your relationships with them. Often times these people are a part of our families, and that’s simply not possible. We CAN change our expectations about these relationships. Perhaps you do more listening to help them in their lives instead of sharing important areas of your life that you know they will not support. You are staffing up with that first list of people, so you don’t need support from this group of people who can’t offer it to you. 

The funny part about this process is that when you are steadfast in driving toward your goals, getting support where you need it and thriving—some of those people who were once negative turn a corner and begin applying for roles on your team. It’s truly wild, but can happen. 

Now that you’ve outlined all the critical roles for your 2017 Team, have fun with your recruiting conversations! Make sure you respect the time of your people, but also don’t fear reaching out. They want you to succeed as strongly as you do—and they will hold you accountable where you, yourself cannot. I was proud to be on the team for many of my friends who were killing their careers in 2016 and was beaming with each achievement. New non-profits created. Documentaries completed, sold and winning awards. Podcasts started. Powerful work-life balance choices. Life is much more full and fun when we’re in it together. And what a relief it is to know that we’ve got our people lined up for the not-so-fun parts.

There’s only one New Year’s Resolution that I’ve ever stuck with. In 2016, my daughters ages 8 and 5, made me promise that I would only wear sparkly nail polish for the entire year. I love this brilliant take on resolutions from a child’s point of view. You don’t need to punish yourself with six days a week of hard labor at the gym if that’s not bringing you joy (and I know for some it does—power to you!). Simply bring more sparkle into your life. Yes, little ladies. I can do this and I did. 

Sparkly polish aside, it’s the premise of resolutions that makes me squirm: there’s something wrong with you that must be changed. Between your hedonist New Year’s brunch (with Bloody Mary, please!) on January 1 and when you go back to work on January 2, you need to become a new person. Not possible! So why waste your energy and set yourself up for failure? 

Another way I like to approach the New Year is to decide top priorities and non-negotiables. And for these priorities to pass muster with our brains that are trained to need immediate satisfaction—you MUST articulate why these are important to you and how you’re going to achieve them. 

Here are some of mine so you can get the hang of it (and hold me accountable, of course!). 

Non-Negotiable #1: Connection With My Daughters: 
Why: My daughters blow me away each day with their view of the world, their generosity with love and hugs and their comic timing (nearly impossible to keep a straight face!) Plus, they will not be this age forever. I want to savor this time and remember that I created my own business in part so I can control my schedule and spend more meaningful time with them. 
How: Build in solo time with each girl, give them options for how they want to spend it, schedule in class trips and time to go into their classrooms, work with them on a list of activities they want to do with me this year and start enjoying those choices with them! 

Non-Negotiable #2: Connection With My Husband:
Why: My partner, my best friend, my love; the one person in the world with whom I would ever share a room and a life. 
How: Date nights, expressing gratitude for all he does, giving him space to do things on his own and see his friends, more hugs. 

Non-Negotiable #3: Creativity and Joy Time:
Why: The evidence from several experiments is in. I’m my best, most interesting, happiest self when I make the things that bring me joy a priority. And I know when I’m close to losing it that I’ve fallen off track with these things. 
How: Running, quiet time, writing, podcasts, friends, connecting people, reading, Prospect Park, coffee. 

Non-Negotiable #4: Support Women To Create Careers and Lives They Love:
Why: I’m lit up by helping others. Period. Then, 10X that when I can help others in an area where there’s a gap in resources and impactful help available. There’s a problem to solve here and it keeps me up at night. How do we support women in their careers and in motherhood so they feel like they can stay in the game, trading in a life of deep overwhelm, guilt and exhaustion for a life they’re proud, happy and grateful to live. 
How: Coaching, writing, connecting women to resources and new contacts, inspiring, speaking, acknowledging, re-framing, experimenting with new tools in my own life. Being there. Staying in it. Continuing to learn from wise teachers. 

Thanks for allowing me to walk my talk in your presence. Once you’ve come up with your Non-Negotiables, I would find a buddy who can keep you accountable. You can set up a time once a month over coffee or a nice meal where you talk about how you incorporated your NN’s into your life. Acknowledge your good work and see what you can tweak. If you’re having trouble fitting one of them in, re-read your why statement. Is it powerful enough for you to buy into it? If not, give it an edit and see where you land.

Congrats to giving up the punishment, pressure and self-loathing of changing your life in one day! Instead you can jump on the path to living an intentional 2017. Phew! See you there. 

When I was in a marketing role at a Fortune-100 Company, I had a mid-year review that started like this. My supervisor looked down at my written self-assessment and uncomfortably said, “Most of the people who report to me struggle with making their work sound important, worthy of praise and even award-winning.” 

Long pause. 

“You don’t have that problem.” 

He may have meant this feedback as a way to keep my ego in check—a plea for me to tone it down a notch, but I remember smiling and thinking, “I nailed this.” For the rest of our meeting, I provided rationale for my assessment with data from my projects and indeed won him over. That year was the first in my tenure at the company where I went on to receive the highest year-end rating and an award for innovation. 

This was also the year I realized that self-promotion, which comes naturally to me, is not an easy fit for many. In fact, it’s something many of my clients, friends and colleagues dread and even resent. 

Here are my 5 Commandments to Self-Promotion that can help you stand out from the pack and be recognized as the leader you already are. 

1) You’re the person responsible for driving your career forward:
Yes. Only. You. It’s wonderful if you have a boss or mentor who proactively helps you manage your career. If you do, you’re the exception and not the rule. YOU are the person who needs to be thinking about your next conversation, your next opportunity and the relationships you need to build. When I hear people blame their lack of promotions or raises on their boss or their company, I ask, “What are YOU doing to get yourself there?” And if the answer to that question is “Working hard.”—guess what? That’s not enough. That’s just the cost of entry! 

2) A small task can make a big impact: 
Sometimes you do something small that changes the trajectory of a project, a relationship or shifts the entire foundation of a company. You made a call. You connected two people. You had an idea. Because it’s small, your instinct may be to overlook it. Don’t. Focus on the results you’re driving or the impact you’re making and not how long the task took for you to complete. Just because an idea came to you in a millisecond doesn’t make it any less brilliant! Make sure you spread the word about the importance of your results with the right people, so that your achievements will be remembered.

3) Because it’s easy for you, does not mean it’s easy for everyone else:
When you’re doing the thing that you do well and you’re in the flow, you can assume that this is how it feels for everyone. Your excellent writing skills can feel like no big deal. Or your Marie Kondo organizational prowess may seem a dime a dozen. They’re not. They’re highly coveted skill-sets! Be sure to talk about these things more than the two times a year you have your review.

4) Be generous with praise, feedback and giving credit where it’s due:
Employees are desperate for feedback and even if you’re not an employee’s direct boss, you take on a leadership role when you’re able to provide well-observed and thoughtful feedback. When you recognize others for their strengths, you create a culture where employees feel appreciated and they in turn will celebrate your good work. You shine when you help others shine and often time’s leaders forget this. 

5) Seize your moments:
If you have a meeting with a senior leader about a project, use it as an opportunity to talk about how well your projects are going, what you’re learning that can impact the company, and how you’re doing in your career overall. These are moments you can use to leverage your exposure, so don’t waste them. They only come around once in awhile…grab your chance! By taking a risk to take the conversation to another level, you’re demonstrating the courage it requires to be in a more senior role or to be in the rooms that bring you one step closer to the promotion you desire. 

If any of this makes you bristle, which it can for some, remember why you’re doing it in the first place. Who do you want to help? How do you want to help grow the company? What kind of life do you want to provide for your family? Remember, by getting your good work out there and noticed, you’re getting closer to that “why.” When people are excited and proud of their work, all of the commandments I mentioned feel genuine and authentically part of conversation. It takes practice, but it’s absolutely achievable! 

In 2016, you did some powerful, courageous and generous things. You also did some stupid, petty and mindless things. I know this because I did too. 

You were empathetic. 
You were mean. 
You were present. 
You started every sentence in the hour before your child’s bedtime with “Don’t.”

Yes, we did that. 

Now, you have two choices about how to move forward. 

Option 1: 
Forget about all the times you nailed it and instead stew and ruminate on why you can’t seem to be a good wife, husband, leader, parent, daughter, son, caregiver or [insert one of a thousand roles you play on a daily basis]. 

Option 2: 
Acknowledge all the ways you kicked 2016’s butt AND all of the ways you failed/were human. Reflect and learn from both. Repeat. 

I know Option 1 sounds like a joke, but you’d be by surprised how many people close out every year by choosing it! When you do choose it, you bring all of that guilt and anger into your brand spanking New Year. As my best girlfriend from childhood would say, “That’s a lot of luggage!” You don’t want to drag an LV trunk worth of negativity into 2017! What a way to cancel out opportunities that await. 

Instead, I ask my clients to choose Option 2 and do this exercise to complete their year. 

1) Block out some quiet time where you won’t be disturbed. (Often the toughest part!)
2) Write a letter to yourself where you:

• Name your 2016 wins—big and small. Whatever is meaningful to you.
• Forgive yourself for things you wish you had done better AND for the things you wanted to do, but didn’t. 
• Be kind, be generous and be accepting of yourself. Treat yourself as you would a close friend or your child. Understanding. Loving. Laughing with instead of at.

2) Read it aloud.
3) Leave your luggage on the stoop. You need to make space for new, exciting and creative ideas, friend. 

Now that you've given 2016 a proper sendoff, add one New Year's toast to Option 2. Onward!